This is Dan.
This is Dan on Helium.
Any questions?
Month: December 2002
I just may have to use my AK
Sometimes you can just tell it’s not going to be a good day. First, I was 15 minutes late to work this morning, so now I have to fill out a leave slip for a half hour of emergency leave. Later, I ran upstairs to the restroom to… well, take care of some business… when I was done I reached over and reached into an empty toilet paper dispenser. I had to wait 10 minutes for the restroom to clear so I could do the Bathroom Cha-Cha over to another, more wipe-friendly stall.
Bad days suck.
Last night, on the other hand was pretty fun. Dan works with such a fascinating mix of people at the hotel and they were out in full effect at their office Christmas party.. French Executives slow dancing to Percy Sledge with the kitchen staff, followed by the GM grinding alongside a Snoop Dogg look-a-like to Missy Elliot’s “Work It”. Bizzare indeed.
I have pictures that I’ll be posting over the weekend.
I Love Wal-Mart
Just in case you were wondering: It is possible to return a digial camera to Wal-Mart after you accidentally drop it into a Irish Pub toilet while in a drunken stupor. No questions were asked.
More pictures of my stairs and cats to follow.
I Might Be Giant
INT. JEFFERSON FEED AND PET SUPPLIES
VINCENT:
Do you have Frontlline for Cats? I think it’s the one in the green box.CASHIER CHICK:
Ummmmmmm, let me check.VINCENT:
Thanks, I’ll take the one in the green box.CASHIER CHICK:
Like no way. Arn’t you in that band?VINCENT:
They Might Be Giants? Um, no.CASHIER CHICK:
Oh, cause you look just like the guy. I was watching a special on them and you look just like him. I met Frankie, from Malcom in the Middle, and now I’m obsessed with the show. Don’t they like play the theme or something?VINCENT:
Yeah, and all the incidental music.CASHIER CHICK:
Yeah, I love them. They’re really good. You look just the guy.
Vincent has come to the pet store to purchase flea-stuff for his cats when he realises that when he entered the store, he had also entered the twilight zone.
Do you have Frontlline for Cats? I think it’s the one in the green box.
Ummmmmmm, let me check.
The cashier chick brings back two boxes of Frontline. One is marked Frontline Plus and is in a green box. The other is in a brown box. She’s not sure which one Vincent wants.
Thanks, I’ll take the one in the green box.
Vincent takes out his wallet. It’s bright red and has the words THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS on one side, the other is a picture of a snowman warming his hands over a pile of burning money.
Like no way. Arn’t you in that band?
They Might Be Giants? Um, no.
Oh, cause you look just like the guy. I was watching a special on them and you look just like him. I met Frankie, from Malcom in the Middle, and now I’m obsessed with the show. Don’t they like play the theme or something?
Yeah, and all the incidental music.
Yeah, I love them. They’re really good. You look just the guy.
Ok, someone else make my day and tell me I look like Flansburg. He’s dreeeeeeeeeeamy.