Oh the pain. The pain.

I set out home from the Pub last night, following the same routine I always do: wrap the chain around the stem and lock the lock on so it dangles to the side of the bike. As I took off, I made a wide s-swerve down the street like I like to do and noticed the lock had shifted to behind the headset, preventing the handlebars from turning properly. “I should fix that at the next intersection” I think to myself. However, the next intersection has a taxi cab entering it from the right hand side and I instictively attempt to turn to avoid it. Since my bars can’t turn, I tried to force it a bit and the lock popped loose and the front wheel spun around perpendicular to the proper travel of the bicycle, throwing me over the bars where I landed in the middle of the intersection square on my left shoulder; breaking my collarbone, dislocating my shoulder, tearing a muscle in my leg and generally making a spectical of myself.

It was totally my fault, as I was going down St. Ann the wrong way, but the cab driver could have at least stopped and ask me if I was OK before he left the scene, rolling over my glasses.

I crawled out of the street, dragging my bike behind me and collapsed on the doorstep of Moon Wok where I began to realise my shoulder was in bad shape. Stumbling into Good Friends, I stepped up to the first guy I see and in a calming tone I say, “Excuse me, could I ask a favor of you? I just flipped over my handlebars and I think I dislocated my shoulder. Could you help me lock up my bike while I call 911?” To which he replies, “Are you going to kill me?”

What the fuck?

I went to the tent hospital’s ER at the Convention Center and got taken good care of after being treated like total shit by the EMT/Ambulance drivers. The docs told me that I had broken my collarbone and may have dislocated my shoulder and should expect several days of the worst pain imaginable and 6 weeks of recovery. Joy. The guy in the partition next me me repeatedly called the nurse a bitch, and dared her to hurt him after giving him morphine for his police-dog bites, “Yeah bitch, make it hurt. I cant feel anything, make it hurt bitch. Yeeeaaah, give me that needle. Stick it in, you fucking bitch.”


Part of me was hoping to see a cute male-nurse I met at the Pub a couple of weeks ago, but no luck. Probably for the best.

Anyway, I get drugs tomorrow and I just want to get to bed tonght.

Why do I see weird shit like this all the time?

I saw the coolest thing coming back from lunch. One of the courthouse sanitation people tripped on the sidewalk and got knocked out cold.

I passed just before and she was arguing with some guy, then I got about a block farther and I heard someone call out “Lawd! Call 911!” I turned around and she on her side in the dirt next to the sidewalk, not moving.

Of course I thought he hit her or something.

I get closer and not only is she not moving at all, but I can tell by his speech patterns that the guy is a little bit retarded. So now I’m, thinking “the retarded guy knifed her!”

Then, I get even closer and I hear people say she’s breathing. But, she unconsience and she’s face first in dirt. No grass, just dirt. No one moves her or anyhting and a few of the people in the back are giggling. I don’t think she was well liked.

Anyway, I recorded the retarded guy on my phone, explaining just how she fell “just like that” but I stopped it right before his co-worker yells out “Stop explaining it before you fall on YOUR ass too!”

I was there for like, 15 minutes and no ambulance ever came, even though it was a block away from charity.